Shining blue eyes

Wingin Mum life

So over the past month there have been changes to our lives. Some due to COVID-19 and also due to the fact that James has reached 20 months and changed some of his routine.

I know time is going too fast. It wasn’t that long ago that he was a quiet little boy who would simply play by himself or sit and watch the whole Peter rabbit movie ( with me).

In the past month James has dropped a nap. I didn’t force this on him. I read about it but I really wasn’t sure how to go about it. I really didn’t want to seem cruel and keep him up for as long as possible. I didn’t want to seem cruel to force him to have a nap at a certain time daily.

I honestly, didn’t know what to do!

I read about it but I wasn’t confident in my mothering skills. So, what did I do?

I tried to get him to nap but more than half of the time it didn’t work. I gave him milk hoping that it would make him sleepy. I read to him. I went out for a walk with him. However, I had no luck.

He would stay up for most of the day and only have a power nap (10-20mins). We both tried so hard to get him to sleep. However, he did sleep all night over 10 hours. So, we really couldn’t complain. I mean, there are kids out there who won’t sleep at night (I was one of them)!

I read somewhere that kids his age needed 12-14 hours sleep. Immediately, I felt awful. I felt that I wasn’t doing the right thing. But, I simply couldn’t get him sleeping when he needed it the most.

After a lot perseverance James had a nap. We didn’t change anything to make him drop a nap. The change in his nap routine was natural. It was him who decided (eventually) when he would fall asleep. After his lunch.

I have to admit it was hard to encourage him to have a nap. He is like a Duracell bunny and literally doesn’t stop all day.

Both Sean and I are now back to our normal hours. This was another change to our lives post-lockdown. We both quickly adapted to lockdown life pretty quickly and now we have adapted again to our life pre-lockdown.

The main change was getting James used to seeing our family more often. So we don’t feel the guilt when we both go to work. Last week we left James with both our parents, to give him time to get used to being alone with them.

It was just like going back to work after maternity leave. I really struggled with it. I think I was the only one who struggled with this. As James was fine. I was the one in tears. I was the one who was craving his hugs ( He gives the best hugs). I was the one who was messaging them asking how he was getting on. I was really missing him.

I was also worried. Worried that they wouldn’t know how to cope with the changes that has been going on with James in the past 5 months. As there has been a lot of changes!

James is now chatty. He doesn’t speak much sentences but he can show and somehow make you understand at times what he is saying. He knows how to grab your attention and he looks into your soul with his amazing blue eyes.

I was worried. That they weren’t expecting this? That they were expecting him an 16 month old version of him. Luckily, they didn’t have any expectations of him. I think they were just happy to see him and see that he was still a happy(ish) little boy but with a big voice!

So basically, I am now wingin mum life. I am not reading any parenting books. As every child is different. I am going to involve James as much as possible when it comes to parenting. As i literally have no idea what I am doing at times!

Hope you are all safe and well.

💖

Soundtrack to our lives

So my little man is napping and I am on the couch listening to music from the noughties. Apparently at around 33 years old you prefer listening to old music and you don’t discover new acts! That’s according to new surveys. Well, for me that is so true!

I prefer old music. It reminds me of my childhood and some good and some sad times. I actually cry when I listen to a few old tracks. If you don’t cry when Bridge over troubled water is on, then you are stronger than me! Music is so emotive which is why in our household we play music everyday even though the music varies, depending on who is in the house.

When I am in the house the music varies from Fleetwood mac, Dusty Springfield, Amy Winehouse to Sam Fender. That’s just a few! I couldn’t possibly list them all! Well, maybe a few more. I love Gladys knight and the Pips, The Corrs, The Civil Wars and The Magic numbers. James does like listening to them with me and he occasionally dances or makes me pick him up and dance with him on our dance floor ( living room floor).

When I am at work Sean takes over the music. This is where our differences lie. He plays Bruce Springsteen, Tom Petty and the heartbreakers, Prince and Smashing Pumpkins. I should point out that I do like Prince, but I don’t play him as much as Sean! He also plays people who I haven’t even heard of such as My Morning Jacket and Jesse Main.

We do both like some of the same music such as The Beatles and Dave Matthews Band. Interesting fact, it was a certain song by them that I knew Sean was the man I was going to marry! This was on the first date! So, after only a few weeks of dating Sean booked us to see Dave Matthews Band.

This is why music is played in this household on a daily music. It’s a soundtrack to our lives. It somehow magically fits in with the memories we are making.

I do think music helps children at an early age. As it will help with language and creativity. Also helps with memory.

As I remember sitting in the back of my parents Passat listening to The Beatles and Elton John going on a mystery tour. Or, going home after visiting the grandparents. I just remember watching the headlights and taillights whilst on the Edinburgh by-pass (ah childhood).

So, it’s great seeing what music piques James’ fancy and he is already showing some interest in some music.

One very surprising song he likes is Lithium by Nirvana. To be honest it’s one of my favourite songs by them, but I didn’t expect him to bob his head to the song too.

Another song he likes is. Well, it’s not really a song but it’s Snoop Dog singing in the just eat advert! Yeah my boy is weird. He is wonderful, but boy, what a variation in music choice!

He does like some kiddie music too! We put on a certain movie about a rabbit ( not Donnie Darko) and he dances along to the music! We have to admit that this movie has a brilliant soundtrack so we can understand why he likes the music when it is played. Wait till you see the video of him dancing to the end credits!

I am not musical and can’t sing a note to save myself. Neither is Sean. However, James is able to hit a note (according to my family) when he sings along to frozen, he goes aaah, so not actually singing. He has a good rhythm and keeps to the beat. So maybe he does have some musicality?

Well, he does have a rockstar name!

Hope you are all safe and well.

💖

Enjoy his moves!

Confidence

I am not a confident person. People may think I am an extrovert for posting about motherhood but I couldn’t be anymore of the opposite!

I feel safe to say what I want behind a screen. With no eyes on me. However, away from the screen I can be a shy and timid women. I have always been shy. People may think I am being closed off but I am not. It takes time for me for my confidence to grow around people.

For me, my confidence has always been my downfall. It even affects my blog. In fact, after I type this, I will pass it on to my husband to check. To check I make sense and I have no spelling mistakes (even though he can’t spell well). So, why do I do this?

I simply don’t have confidence in myself.

I have never really had confidence in myself.

This is not a pity post but I wanted to show that even with not a lot of confidence I can help others. I can give others reassurance sharing my life as a mother, as a not so confident mother.

Most of the time my husband and I are wingin’ it at parenthood. I try to make decisions based on my sons best interests but I never really have the confidence. I worry that the decision I have made is not right.

This is all down to my confidence in myself.

I really hope it doesn’t affect the way I raise James. However, only time will tell.

Hope you are all safe.

Take care

💖

The mum identity

Ever worry that once you are a mum, your personality has to change? You loose your identity and become known as simply James’ mum?

Well, I am here to say don’t change!

Stay true to yourself.

I thought I would change but I haven’t changed much ( I think)!

I have a great group of friends and some of them have said that I have always acted like a mum. I would always make them message me when they get home. I even do that to my aunt!

I still act aloof at times and get excited about the simple things in life, like, when a tune comes on the radio or when it rains heavily (I know that’s weird)!

I try to maintain my identity before I was pregnant the adrenaline junkie, cheesy music and sometimes serious mum. However, that can be hard. As James has now tamed me! So goodbye adrenaline Nicola and hello more sensible Nicola!

Louisa May Alcott (one of my favourite authors) wrote in Little Women “I am angry in nearly everyday of my life”. This was said by Marmee March and now that I am a mum to a 19 month old boy, I can relate to this. I can understand why she is angry, as there was a civil war during the time of Little Women and she was embarrassed by her country. She wanted her daughters to be raised in a country that treated everyone equally.

So there are some parallels of this and where we are now in this terrifying world.

Before James arrived I was naive and I really didn’t have a clue what is happening in this world. I really didn’t have a care! I was too busy having a laugh with friends, watching great movies and a few ice hockey games.

Now, I am more aware of the scary world. I am almost angry every day. I am angry at the world and I get angry if James doesn’t listen to me or if other people don’t listen to me (it does happen). I get angry that my voice is not heard. The voice of a scared mum who wants the best for their child.

There are so many things I want to change in this world. I wish everybody’s thoughts can be heard. Have people forgotten about freedom of speech?

Well , mums want their voices to be heard too. We don’t want to be pushed over or forgotten!

Especially this mum!

This is a new change in me. I was never one to confront anyone. I actually never sent a plate back until last year! I have become more assertive and since I have a big responsibility I want my opinions and any issues I have to be heard.

I never thought about becoming a blogger until a few months after James arrived. Having James has given me the confidence to be heard. The confidence that I can help other mums with any issues.

I want to raise James teaching him that he has a voice and he should speak up on what he is passionate about.

I honestly thought that when I would become a mum I would have to be dressed in white linen (or stripes) and take up yoga (still haven’t). I thought that I would become a wee bit like Mary Poppins and do something amazing with James everyday.

That painted a picture right?

Well, I am no Mary Poppins! I do occasionally wear stripes but no linen.

I am still fun, but not like Mary Poppins, more like myself. I would try to come up with some crazy ideas for James to try.

Even though I have been tamed. James and I still listen to cheesy music and have a dance to it to hearts content.

I just have a voice. A identity.

I am Nicola.

The voice of a mum who is almost angry everyday. Who now has the confidence to stand up for herself and not relying on others to do it for herself.

So stay true to yourself.

Stay safe

💖

Buying second hand

Hope everyone is coping with the lockdown!

When we went out for a walk we bumped into one of our neighbours and ended up talking about the cost of raising children. As it is expensive!

They proceeded to tell us that a colleague of theirs who is staying in a house paid by the council, wants to get new stuff for their unborn child. This person is refusing to go into good charity shops and is refusing second hand clothes and toys. I was so surprised to hear this. As a good cot can cost upwards of £100!

We were very lucky, in that retrospect. As my parents held onto a lot of my stuff when I was a baby and that included my cot (with bite marks too). My in laws kept a crib that Sean slept in. So it was nice to know that two generations have used them.

However, that didn’t stop there! There were toys and books galore! Books that I remember ranging from Peter Rabbit to Maisie. Some that aren’t appropriate for him just now, but, we can give him later. Those books hold precious memories to me. Of when my parents would read to me at night and would try to skip pages so I will fall asleep quicker ( it didn’t work)! So I am looking forward to reading them with him when he is older, creating new memories

That’s the thing with second hand toys. They might be toys that you might remember and have old fond memories of.

I am taking nothing away from new toys. It is new but they do cost a fortune.

When we discovered that we were having a baby, we looked and researched for all the baby products we needed.

We went to a good charity shop in my home town where we got a lot of things for him ranging from a baby play mat, clothes, books and even a baby changing table. I don’t turn down a bargain!

The only thing we bought new was a pram as we got a baby car seat with it, bedding and a few other things that we needed to get new. We saved a bit of money so we can put it towards days out for him.

We were very lucky that we have some friends who have kids who offered to give us some stuff for him. For me it was a no brainier! I jumped for the chance, also it was hard to say no. The products were in good quality and they helped us out massively without spending too much.

Now, that James is older we have passed his stuff down to those friends. It was hard to let go of some of the stuff but knowing it will help a fellow mum out is great. Where they can start creating new memories with their little one.

Over the weekend we received toys from my parents neighbour. James loved them and played with them straightaway after he received them. There was a pirate ship, a farm and much more! All in great quality and so much fun to play with. We were extremely grateful.

We also received outdoor toys which cost a lot. Again James loved them straightaway. Especially his cosy coupe ride on. He even tries to honk the horn and plays with the steering wheel whilst making car noises. It is so adorable to watch and see him having so much fun!

So please when the lockdown is over. If you have a clear out give them to a charity shop or to someone you know. They will be very grateful!

Stay safe out there.

💖

Waiting for the storm to come

Do you ever feel like shouting out loud until your lungs burst?

Do you ever feel angry for no reason? You simply just wake up in an angry mood and just want to stay curled up in bed and listen to the pitter patter of rain.

Well, my friends, that is me today.

I woke up like grumpy the dwarf. I didn’t want to wake up but I did. My son needed me. Granted he wasn’t crying out for me but I could hear him talking to himself and doing some kind of gymnastics in his cot.

So, being half awake I went to the toilet and checked up on him. He was delighted to see me and his smile made me feel warm. It didn’t however, stop me from being angry.

We then proceeded to go downstairs and be in the company of Sam and Thomas. I fed him and then played with him. Also known as chasing each other around the table and trying to scare each other.

But I still felt this anger slowly build up in me.

I then decided to do some work. Surely, ticking some stuff on my to do list would help with this rage? Nope!

I still felt this anger.

This anger was getting to me. This anger was scaring me. I have no idea what is going on with me and you know what? I hate it.

I hate feeling like this. I hate that this anger is building up in me like a storm cloud rumbling around my head. I feel like I could cry but I can’t. I feel low and I am ashamed to say this, I don’t feel like a good and even a decent mum.

I sometimes say to my husband what Winnie the Pooh character I am during the day. However, there is no character that can reflect my feelings and emotions. If I am a Disney character today it would probably a mixture of anger, disgust and sadness from Inside out. Yes, I am so mixed up today that I am not even one character!

This post is particularly hard for me to write about and really close to the bone for me. As I am sharing with you all my truest emotions today.

I know everyone has bad days and this is mine. I want to show that if you are having days like I am having today then you are not alone.

I don’t like keeping my emotions to myself. I have learned from the past that my emotions can manifest and turn into a dementor taking away most of my happiness.

I don’t want to be a turtle and hide from anyone. I am extremely lucky that I have my son who is tuned into my emotions and tries so hard to keep me going and cheering me up. I am so lucky that I can talk to my husband and even show him this. As I am frightened that when I do talk I will burst into tears and will become non-verbal.

I know some of you might not have the outlets that I have. So I want you all to know that I can be your outlet. I understand and can empathise with you on how you are feeling. I know it’s not easy. It never is. But, you don’t need to keep it to yourself and make it worse.

After showed this post to my husband I cried and cried. I couldn’t hold onto my emotions any more. He then hugged me, then James hugged me. Trying to make me feel better and you know what? James’ hug made me feel that little bit better.

So please talk to someone if you do feel like this. There are many charities set up and there is also me.

No one should ever feel alone when feeling like this. So if you need to message me. I will be there!

💖💖

Do all mums wear stripes?

Hi everyone, how are you all doing?

I thought of something different to write about last night whilst running James a bath. As I didn’t want to write another blog with me moaning about the lockdown and the demands on motherhood.

Instead I want to know your style!

I am kind of in a style limbo at the moment. Maybe because of the lockdown or maybe because I have been wearing the same clothes as I have been gardening over the past week.

I usually wear a pair of boots from Marks and Spencers which are so comfy that I have them in brown and black. This is accompanied with a pair of jeans and a long sleeved top. I usually wear black, red and navy colours. I don’t know why but I usually prefer those colours.

During the lockdown I have been watching and I mean a lot of The Great British Bake Off (I am actually hooked on it). You know what I noticed? The mums not wearing designer gear but wearing floral blouses and stripes. Why do you see so many mums in those clothes?

Are stripes part of the mum uniform?

I wore stripes before I became a mum because I thought it looked good on me. Mainly navy and white. Now, when I wear a striped top I feel more mum like. Is that even a thing?

My mum is hooked on stripes and she knows she is. When we went out clothes shopping I would question her and establish if she really needed it. Most of the time she didn’t! But she does have a lot of stripes! Maybe that’s why I feel more mum like when I wear stripes?

However, I wear stripes on the odd occasion.

I don’t want to dress to stand out. I don’t want to dress to show that I am a mum. I want to dress to show my cool(ish) side.

Ok, I am not that cool.

So the other day when I was feeling blue I decided it was about time I treated myself. So I bit the bullet. I bought a couple of new tops and a leather jacket from Dorothy Perkins. I had one many years ago and loved it. I wanted to feel like an inner rock goddess 🤣 plus I wanted to get one for a gig I am hopefully going to in October.

I also bought a new pair of jeans from my trusted Marks and Spencers as I don’t need to take them up as much. Being short has a lot of downfalls! It was a couple of years since I bought jeans. So I thought I should get some that actually fit me!

I have noticed that I have said “I thought” a lot. However, all mums need to treat themselves, more so than ever now.

Well, that’s my excuse!

So I need your opinion folks!

Should I carry on showing my inner rock goddess?

Or should I wear something completely different or succumb to the stripes?

Any opinions are welcome!

Stay safe everyone

💖

Walking outside

Bump! Thud!

Aren’t those sounds the scariest sounds you hear?

For me it is is. I hate those sounds. I am scared and worry what has happened to my son. Did he hurt himself badly? Will he be ok? Those questions were running around my head today.

Today we were all out in the garden. We were weeding the patio (not a glamorous job). James was off doing his own thing playing with a stick on a planter. Then he decided to run to us cause he wanted to help. However, when he ran he tripped and landed face first on our patio. He cried and cried. Tears running fast down face. He was frightened, he was in pain and most of all he wanted reassurance. I felt so bad and scared.

My husband scooped him up in his arms whilst I ran to get cotton wool with some water to clean him up, with those questions running through my head. I was worried. I was worried that he hit his head too hard. I was worried that he was in a lot of pain. However, I was mostly worried that he was angry with me. Angry that I let him run around in the garden. This made me feel more anxious and made me start to panic. I felt like a vice was around a chest.

I had to breathe.

So when I grabbed the cottonwool I took a big breathe in. It helped. So I ran immediately downstairs to cleanse his bump.

I managed to clean his bump and give him a lot of reassurance. I checked him over, being a nurse I knew what to look out for if he were to loose consciousness. I fed him as I knew he would want to drink either milk or water.

After his milk he quickly bounced back into action. He immediately turned back into his cheeky and mischievous self. I felt so relieved that his bump wasn’t more serious. I felt relieved that he quickly settled but I was more relieved that he wasn’t in a lot of pain. He didn’t cry after that. He didn’t show any signs of pain. There was no scrunched face, there was no clenching of fists. Instead, there was a cheeky smile and that twinkle in his eye.

He was fine. He was safe. He was close to me and he was happy.

I felt much more relieved. Relieved that he wasn’t in pain and relieved that he wasn’t seriously hurt. My anxiety calmed down and I could breathe easier.

When we are outside on our walks I am always beside him. Whether it will be holding his hand or his oversized hood (why do hoods always have ears)? So I at least have some control to stop him from falling and chasing cars and dogs. This is only when we are outside on walks. I wouldn’t do that in the garden. I am trying very hard to let him have the freedom and explore. Also to let him grow in confidence with his walking/running.

Ever since he was around 7 months he showed interest in walking and being like us. I wouldn’t want his determination to stop. I would hate that. So I try to maintain and promote his walking outside. I try to let him walk without me being so close with just a fingertip over his hood. I have used reins but I find it difficult to put them on James. They are just so fiddly. They take forever to put on.

So I bite the bullet and see if he would hold my hand or let me hold his hood. Most of the time he would let me hold his hood. If we are out somewhere else he would hold my hand. He wouldn’t hold anyone else’s.

I guess this shows that he trusts me and knows that I am looking out for him. I hope!

We go out for a walk daily encouraging him to walk. He would only walk so far until he wants up in our arms. We try to empower him to walk more but that is when he throws a tantrum and wants to stay up. So we either put him in his pram or his trike.

The both of us want him to feel confident when walking outside beside a road. Becoming aware of the traffic and listening to us and our instructions. I know that is a hard a stretch. However, I feel that this is best for him. I want him to be aware of his surroundings and how to be safe.

That is the most important thing of all. I simply want my son to be safe. I can’t keep him in cottonwool all the time.

So I am trying as much as I can to no longer keep him wrapped up. I guess that’s part of motherhood, right?

So I am putting this out there to all mums. If you have any tips on how to handle and promote walking outside, leave a comment and let me know. It would be greatly appreciated.

Hope you are all safe and well

💖

Am I a normal(ish) mum

Ok hands up if you wake up with your little one crying and you wish you could roll over and go back to sleep.

Hands up if you put on something for your little one until you feel more awake.

Hands up if you can’t function until after a cup of coffee.

If your hand is risen then you are a lot like me! But is this normal?

Do we have to be portrayed in a social convention and be like Mary Poppins? Or be like those happy mums seen in adverts? Who might not necessarily be mums but actresses who have scraped the barrel for jobs. Do we have to put pressure on ourselves and be the practically perfect mum even though we struggle to get up?

I am getting fed up of this. I don’t feel like those mums portrayed and come up with amazing ideas for my son. I don’t feel like I am truly myself until after my mug of coffee.

But I ask you, the public and fellow mums. Do you feel like this?

Is this normal?

What is normal?

Am I a normal(ish) mum?

Perhaps I am not normal.

Do I care? Maybe more than I should.

When I watch tv the mums look so well dressed and appear to have it altogether. Whereas, I dress in the comfy tops and jeans that are too big for me. Cause I am not a big shopper and hate shopping for trousers. My hair just goes all over the place and I have no make up on ( I wear make up rarely anyway). I don’t wear crisp linen white shirts and I don’t have a glistening white smile. Whereas my teeth are not glistening and I wouldn’t dare wear a white linen shirt (that’s just asking for trouble with stains).

Even though I don’t dress like a mum. I do care. I do care about my appearance but sometimes I don’t feel like getting myself ready and I am fine sitting on my sofa in my pjs. I don’t want to put make up on and sort my hair, when I feel no one will notice. I try to work on my appearance but just now I am like, why bother? Why should I change the way I dress? Why should I put on make up? Do I even need to put on make up?

Am I a normal(ish) mum now?

There are mums who focus on exercise and healthy eating. I personally don’t know how they have time! As I spend most of my days playing with James where I am being used as a climbing frame.

I would love to cook healthy meals more often for my family to enjoy. I would love to swap recipes with other mums. I would love to make a brand new recipe! I suppose I still have time to do that in the future but I still would like to do something in the present.

You know what else I would love to do? Yoga. Isn’t that such a mum thing to do? I would stay in my living room (i wouldn’t dare go to a class) and put on the tv learning some poses. That sounds amazing eh? However, doing this with a 17 month old running around affecting your balance is really hard. I have attempted to try but James sees me standing up and wants lifted. If he doesn’t get lifted he cries. If I try to do the dog or cobra pose he would simply climb onto me.

So instead I have tumble time and focus mostly on him then myself.

Does this make me a normal(ish) mum?

Many mums have nice clean and tidy homes. With a grey wall or two! I have no grey walls at my place. I am tempted to paint a wall a grey in the future, but I am getting off subject here!

Anyway getting back to the subject! I do try to make time to clean my home but again James gets in the way. He does try to help and copies me dusting and cleaning the floor. I should point out that it is his choice! How do other mums do this? How do other mums keep their home so clean like it’s a show home?

If you know please let me know.

James is at the point where he has toys everywhere and I mean everywhere! When I am hoovering I find toys in the most surprising of places! We do have toy boxes but he likes to remove toys from them. I am past the point of putting them back. I mean what’s the point? As he will simply take them out again!

Am I a normal(ish) mum?

If any of these relates to you please let me know.

I am actually questioning myself here!

Hope you are all safe and well

💖💖

Me time

How are you all doing?

Struggling to get some time to breathe? Or perhaps have a glass of wine (or in my case coffee) in peace?

Well, I am here to say you are not alone.

You are not alone with feeling guilty that you want some time to yourself.

Everyone deserves to have some time to themselves. Especially in this current climate.

How are we able to maintain a healthy lifestyle for our children and for each other? When we don’t take the time to rest and recharge our batteries before the kids strike demanding attention.

So I am hoping that this can persuade and show you to have some time to yourself.

I am terrible, absolutely terrible to take time out for myself. Just ask my other half! I focus a lot of my day doing activities and mainly playing with James and cleaning the house. Even though James does try to help me (bless him).

However, it does take a toll on me. I become more irritable and frustrated. I hate to say this but I shout at James when he doesn’t eat or spits out his food or simply ignoring me! I even get frustrated at myself when I do something stupid. In particular when I can’t find something important (when it was in front of me). I also have a cry as I feel bad and my emotions are all over the place whilst I dig into an Easter egg.

The current climate doesn’t help with this. I miss going out to soft plays. I miss showing James new places. However, most of all I miss seeing family and friends. I hate the fact that James doesn’t see them and doesn’t comprehend what is happening.

So last week I made the decision to focus on myself. That is why I didn’t post anything in the past week. I wanted to take some time to rest and have more quality time with James and not become the worse version of me. I wanted to be mum 2.0!

You know what?

I had a great time with James. When he went for a nap. I would sit back and watch a new guilty pleasure Disney’s Fairytale Weddings. It’s so cheesy but so good at the same time. It also makes me want to renew my wedding vows in 9 years! No house work just time to myself. Thinking how amazing would a Disney wedding be. I know I am getting off subject here!

James could have a mini nap or a long nap. So I make most of this time to recharge my batteries. Even though I don’t have a coffee I feel refreshed ready for him and anything he throws my way (most likely to be balls)!

Don’t get me time wrong I do love spending time with my bear cub. But I don’t like my being annoyed at him. I don’t like getting annoyed at him. So it only makes sense that I have a rest and take time for myself.

I am trying to focus on myself more. Simply by having a bath or just reading a book. Just by having 15 minutes to myself makes me feel 10 times better. I won’t feel bad as I know I will be more fun for James to play with.

I know there might be people who don’t like baths. So here are some other ideas. For what you can do whilst your little one is having a nap:

Listen to a podcast (currently listening to The Office Ladies)
look through photos and start a photo album or scrapbook
Watch a programme you have wanted to watch for a long time
have a coffee/tea with cake
Have a nap!

Everyone needs time to themselves.

Stay strong and stay safe

💖