Terrible tantrums

So, I have been off for the past two days and mainly been playing with my son. He is two and a half years old, and boy, he really is changing becoming more boy like! 

In my opinion, I think it is important to lay down the ground rules at his age. He already knows that there are limits. However, he will still try to push our limits and do things that we have told him not to do. 

He is showing off many more characteristics from being a showman to throwing tantrums. Tantrums that a Disney princess would be proud of! Yes, he throws himself down onto the sofa or bed Princess style in a state of grief. It is so amazing yet hilarious to watch at the same time!

However, no child is the same! Every child does throw tantrums – some may start early and some, well let’s face it, every child will throw a tantrum at some point in their life! 

His tantrums are becoming more regular as he wants the same things we have. If we are on the phone talking to a family member or a friend, he will try to snatch it out of our hands. He will even try to get in between us and the phone and attempt to put the attention onto himself.

It’s not only the phones he will try to take out of our hands. He will also try and steel the remote controls. James simply loves pressing buttons and also somehow manages to do things on the tv that we can’t do (we are still trying to work something out)! He does have a toy remote and toy phone but he thinks that they are not good enough. We do show him his toys but he will simply throw them away and run to our phone or the remote.

We do try to teach him that he can’t throw toys (apart from balls). We try teaching him of what is good and what is bad. We also try to teach him that he can’t play with curtains. Basically, if there is anything in his reach, he will make a play for it and try to obtain it within his powers!

We do tell him off. We sit him down on the ground or out in the hallway on the naughty stepand ignore him for up to a minute. We let him know when to come in and he has learned that he cannot get away with what he had done.

Through online coaching we found it to be the best method to calm him down and reflect on his actions. We used Devie (deviecoach.com), which allowed us to reflect on how we can best handle James’ tantrums. It also made us more aware on how we can communicate better with James. We weren’t so specific in giving James instructions before and we weren’t so specific in telling him off. In the past we would have shouted “NO!” However, through the online coaching we found that if we said please don’t lick the stone, or, please don’t kiss the lamp post. He would comply. By the way, kissing the lamp post is true!  So, we have took on this approach and it has helped us when trying to calm James down during his tantrums and it works! I know this may not work for all toddlers and parents, but, if you’re struggling then it’sdefinitely worth a shout!

Devie also looks at other aspects of parenting such as biting, aggression and not listening. You are also able to connect with the experts. Yes, you do have to pay to use the online coaching however, in my opinion it helps. It also helps you to communicate better with your little one and enjoy playtime with them.

Some tantrums can indicate if something is wrong with him. It’s not so much that he wantssomething. It’s more of a way for him to indicate that something is wrong. Sometimes it can be that he is thirsty or hungry. Other times it can simply be tiredness. As parents it’s up to us to play detective and find out what they are trying to say. We are still learning! Every day is a new lesson for not only him, but also us!

A great example of this, was the other day. I was planning on going out for a walk with him. It was a nice day and there was a digger across the road. So, what did he do? He decided to run across the road without holding onto my hand. I let it slide. He then did it again. This time, I was angry at him. I told him off and said he had to hold my hand when crossing the road. He then threw the mightiest of tantrums on our street. We then went home. I left him in the hallway under supervision to calm down. He did. He then, came to me and hugged me, then went to sleep. Later, that day we went out for a walk. He took my hand immediately to cross our road. He continued doing this for our walk and he walked beautifully. Now, I am not saying its because of the approach we took. I honestly, don’t know what got into his head. However, I am glad something clicked in there!

Don’t get me wrong, I do love my son unconditionally, but sometimes he does know the buttons he can press to frustrate me! Especially, when he throws a tantrum for not getting his own way when I am trying to protect him. Specifically, when we are out in the garden and he tries to eat a stone. This does frustrate me as he doesn’t understand why I have said no and that will sometimes make his tantrums worse.

For me, coping with the tantrums can be the funny side of motherhood.

That’s just me though, as for some other mums it can be tough. As their little ones might push and push making you even more annoyed and frustrated at them and yourselves.

It can be tricky handling their tantrums. If you are anything like me you will have to try not to laugh. As you don’t want them to think that they can get away with throwing a tantrum. Other times you might need to harness your anger in so you don’t scare your little one. It’s all about the balance. That’s the tricky part.

It’s one of the trickiest parts of them growing up! Showing their character and how they could be a mini hulk to a caring Captain America (had to put in something relating to Marvel in here). It can be amazing watching them but, like I said it will be hard. Parenthood ain’t easy!

So, for all the parents out there! We can get through the tantrums! We can get through this tough time with our mini hulks!

Stay safe

💖